Just Saying | Jamie xx

This weekend was a long one. A good one. And a hard one.

As breakups go, I have to say this was one of the best. No fighting. No disagreements. No revealing of lies. No placing blame. Just two people who care for each other having the same doubts, asking the same questions, feeling the same distance, coming together together to realize they were not alone in thinking about not being together. 

The day after it happened I went to Oakland. BART was closed for construction so i had to take the ferry. After living in SF for 10 years, I’ve never taken the ferry to the east bay before. 

It was exactly what I needed.

Pulling away from the ferry building on the water I saw the city from an angle I’ve never seen. The 1915 lettering at the very top. The giant bow and arrow on Embarcadero. Things I had seen so many times before looked so different and new. So did the whole city. So did a lot of things at that moment.

I can’t really put my finger on how I felt on that ferry ride. I felt tired. I felt happy. I felt unsettled. I felt calm. I felt scared. And i felt free. 

I felt like I was in a place I’d never been before.

But listening to this song the whole time made me feel like i was home.