Lone Wolf | Georgi Kay

I will always be a lone wolf. Forever howling at the moon.

This Georgi Kay song has been my go to while I've been traveling. And I've got a lot of travel going on - I'm on trip two of three this month...or now maybe five depending on work.

Each place (Chicago, LA, Portland, NY) is filled with people I love and who love me. And I know I'm the luckiest girl to have so many awesome friends all over the place. But whenever I'm traveling, I'm always reminded of how alone I am.

But not in a bad way. In a comforting way actually.

And this song just taps into that perfectly. 

I don't know shit about wolves or how they live. I've just heard the terms "lone wolf" and "wolf pack" in random TV shows or movies through out my life. I've heard soon-to-be-hungover guys talk about finding their "wolf pack". I've heard the dark, untethered, seemingly dangerous character being described as a "lone wolf".

I don't know which behavior is the default. I don't know which one is the anomaly. But I know what I'm lead to believe. I know which one people idolize. I know which one people fear. And I know the one that I've feared for a while.

But as I've listened to this song on repeat, by myself, looking out of plane, train, and car windows I've come to terms with how much of a "lone wolf" I really am. I've come to terms that I'm a little more comfortable with solitude than myself, and others, have been lead to believe.

And as I've hugged hello and kissed goodbye to so many my people, I've been reminded that I've never been without a pack.  I've been reminded that I've always been able to find the people who protect me and who I protect.

I don't know which behavior is the default. And I don't know which one is the anomaly. But I know that I straddle both.

And that can feel a little uncomfortable and unsettled.

But it can also feel fucking amazing.  And so fucking right.